Is Your Best Good Enough (For You)?

We were taught “always do your best.” Work hard, do your best and you will be rewarded. The harder you work, the more you will achieve, the more you will be rewarded. Where is the happiness in this formula?

What if we modify the teaching to “work hard doing what you love”? And then what if we add “and you will be rewarded with a sense of fulfillment”?

Is doing your best measured against what you think that means to other people? In my past I have reflected on why a boss’ words meant so much to me. This is a part of our programming: we were taught to please other people.

When we judge ourselves against other peoples’ expectations, we set ourselves up for burnout and disappointment. Not only at work, but also for our interactions at home and at play.

Sometimes it is hard to tell when we are doing something for ourselves, or when we are doing something for others. If you feel emotion or stress around responsibility or obligation, based on something someone else has said, or what you believe someone else thinks, it is time to reflect about what is important to you. Is the responsibility or obligation something you need to accept and take on?

When we give too much of ourselves, it is time for selfcare.

You can only be present after you take care of yourself. It is the airplane oxygen mask example, in which you help yourself first to be able to care for others.

What does selfcare look like? Is it to disconnect, like with a pint of ice cream and Netflix? Is it to reconnect with a walk in the woods?

As we move away from judging ourselves by other people’s expectations, we are less “ambushed” by the feeling of disappointment or letting down someone else. This perception correction decreases the anxiety and stress in our relationships. When we are doing our best for ourselves doing what we love, fulfillment is the result. What is doing your best? That is up to you to determine and be in control of.